Who’s afraid of the Big Bad Terrorist Ice Cream Truck Driver?

The FBI just arrested a Pakistani immigrant living in Lodi, CA. He is an ice cream truck driver — a real threat to the community! This man is a multiple threat. If he doesn’t get you with a bomb in his/your bank, he will sell you sugar bombs that will drive your blood sugar up and give you diabetes or a stroke.

The son went to Pakistan and may have attended a "terrorist camp". Or he may have gone there for a wedding of a relative. We aren’t sure, because the FBI used approved interrogation techniques devised by the Rumsfeld/Gonzales crowd and so we don’t know if the young man told the FBI what he wanted them to hear or what he thought they wanted to hear or what they told him that he should want to tell them. When you are held by the FBI without sleep or a chance to gather yourself, you might tell them anything to get a chance to take a nap.

So what do we have? We have accused terrorists, but are they really accused terrorists? Maybe they are just accused of violating some sort of immigration law. Or maybe they are accused of lying to the FBI. Or maybe they are being accused of not knowing whether to lie or how to tell the correct lies that would get them accused of terrorism.

But one thing is for sure — these men will not have to go through the rigors of trial. All that is important is that they can be accused and thus be separated from their previous lives. They can now be classified as some sort of "enemy combatants" or "enemy ice cream truck terrorists" or "prisoners of war" and be locked away indefinitely.

The people of Lodi will not be able to get their sugar bombs from this Pakistani. They will have to go to Albertsons and get their blood sugar raised by an all-American sugar bomb diabetes dispenser –” a friend, not a foe.