Note to Michael Jackson — Time to Grow Up, Chase Girls, etc.

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Dear Michael Jackson:

We know that U.S. President George W. Bush says he did not "grow up" and recover from his youthful indiscretions until he was about forty years old. Of course, George’s youthful indiscretions did include some drug use and some irresponsibilities while serving in the military, a college "party boy" career, etc. But one way or another, George did change his circle of companions and assume a more adult-like role in the world.

Michael, we know that you had a queer life as a child. You were performing and singing and dancing and did not get to have a typical growing up period. So, it might be understandable that you wanted to enjoy some of the things you may have missed. But, Michael, you are headed towards age 50 now — surely you can move onto the next phase of your life.

You built an amusement park named "Neverland" where you could play like Peter Pan. Fine, now that you lived there for more years than the typical adolescence, surely you can move on. You got to sleep over with lots of young boys and without impure sexual desires. Taking you at your word about that, Michael, surely the time has passed for you to do that. You can chalk sleeping with boys off your life list of things you wanted to do, and move onto to other things.

Now that you are in your fifth decade of life –” maybe it is time you discover girls, better yet young women. Surely among your many fans are lots of attractive, sweet young women, say from age 25 up to 40 who you could sleep with and get over your loneliness. Of course, this would be totally non-sexual until you are ready to get married for real, perhaps by age 65.

Michael, we can plainly see that your development has been retarded by your unfortunate lifestyle, which gave you hundreds of millions of dollars but little else. But it is time to move on, make progress, expand your horizons, and become a more well-rounded human being.

In due time, you might want to get some fast cars, maybe get a college education, join the army for a few years, become a Mormon missionary, grow a beard — anything to move beyond living in an amusement park and sleeping with little boys. If it turns out that your are a homosexual, Michael, maybe you would want to move to Greenwich Village and become someone else’s little boy.

It is time to move on, Michael. Say bye bye to your teams of plastic surgeons. Say bye bye to your sleepover pals. Say bye bye to your California lifestyle, Micheal. Get yourself a Harley and hit the road and let the next phase of your life begin.

Good luck Michael!

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